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Things you never want to hear from podiatry patients

Discussion in 'Podiatry Trivia' started by Robertisaacs, Aug 29, 2007.

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  1. Members do not see these Ads. Sign Up.
    This made me smile in another thread

    Been there. Done that.

    So in the spirit of investigation

    Top three things you never want to hear from a patient again!
    Mine are

    1. "I've been doing some research on the internet"
    2. "My consultant told me i had to wear heels for my circulation"
    3. "i bought these corn removal pads..."

    Any offers?
     
  2. LuckyLisfranc

    LuckyLisfranc Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Hmmm....

    1. I thought you guys just cut toenails?
    2. Did you get the root out?
    3. Yeah, I'm a lawyer...

    LL
     
  3. andymiles

    andymiles Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    1. i'm slightly diabetic
    2. i took the dressing off to let the air get to it
    3. when did they change the name from shiropody to podeyatry



    and the day is still young :)
     
  4. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "It got really painful so i had a hack at it with a stanley knife / razor blade / scythe"
     
  5. footman1972

    footman1972 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    My feet hurt all the time when I wear these shoes - what's wrong with my feet?
     
  6. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "What do you mean the shoes are causing the problem? Ther're good shoes, they were really expensive."
     
  7. Tuckersm

    Tuckersm Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "is it the acid in my toe nails"


    and the patient with the arterial ulcer " I've smoked all my life and I've never had any problems"
     
  8. Peter

    Peter Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    1. The doctor said you are going to give me insoles
    2. I didn't like the last podiatrist, he cut me on one occasion
    3. There is a degree in cutting toenails! :mad:
     
  9. andymiles

    andymiles Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    my toenails grow quicker because of the tablets i'm on
     
  10. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Things you hate hearing patients say

    1. I know it says George on the referral, but you can call me Mandy...
    2. I work part-time as a lay-partner for the HPC
    3. Rufus, come out that nice man's case

    Things you love hearing patients say

    1. I'm a traffic warden
    2. Do you think these insoles will help my infertility?
    3. I just love my six-inch Manolos (unless she calls herself 'Mandy')
     
  11. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "I put my knickers on over my tights. Oh i'll just take everything off" :(
     
  12. cheryl

    cheryl Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Upon asking how are you feet at the moment?

    "there getting long"

    What your feet???? drives me nuts that one
     
  13. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Along the same lines

    "they need doing badly."

    Fine, i'll work left handed.
     
  14. footman1972

    footman1972 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    I have always said that my retirement projects will be a definative guide to the foundation garments of the over 70's... :D
     
  15. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Please do. Spare the next generation of podiatrists the hours of ptsd counciling and electric shock therapy.
     
  16. drsarbes

    drsarbes Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Wow, these are funny!
    Mine are:

    1. Tell me about possible complications, something ALWAYS goes wrong when I have a surgery.
    2. The guy I work with said it's probably a heel spur and one shot will get rid of it for good.
    3. Yes, I take insulin, coumadin, lithium and predisone. When can I have my surgery?
     
  17. Dawn Bacon

    Dawn Bacon Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Good thread, made me laugh out loud :)
    Mine are:

    1. Oh I had "insoles" from the physiotherapist/chiropractor/osteopath - they don't work.
    2. My (previously insensate) foot is suddenly painful - that must be a good sign, getting some feeling back.

    and not from a patient, but at a party:
    3. So, do you like working with children.

    Poll
     
  18. markjohconley

    markjohconley Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "I MUST HAVE THE WORST FEET IN THE WORLD (YOU'VE EVER SEEN)" ..... drives me mental

    Anyone noticed the increased incidence of coughing in the waiting room, like "i'm here and your 10 seconds late!!!"
     
  19. Asher

    Asher Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Question: And what type of shoes do you experience the problems in?

    Answer: Oh either my black ones or my red ones



    ... Ahhhhhh
     
  20. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Great thread...

    I never want to hear from patients:

    1. I'm having a temporary cash-flow problem...
    2. My friend goes to a reflexologist, do you do that too?
    3. The feet are great but my Bowel obstruction is murder...
    4. Will that hurt? (Before I administer an L.A), No I reply, I won't feel a thing!
    5. A Funeral Director once asked me "...so what made you want to specialise in feet?"
    6. Do you guys (Podiatrists') make Shoes as well?


    keep 'em coming ..... :D
     
  21. markjohconley

    markjohconley Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    " (Did) you know Mark, {pause} i'm a widow now"
     
  22. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Buwwwahhahahah !!!!

    Mark you lucky beast! :D :D :D
     
  23. N.N.

    N.N. Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    This thread is tops! I haven't laughed out loud in ages!

    One thing I may add to the list is when patients say -
    'Oh, I can't afford orthotics.' Then later in the treatment you discover them saying, 'oh I'm going on a round the world trip to visit 50 different countries to see and eat everything'.

    sigh....
    I also dislike it when patients say 'oh so what sort of young person like you decided to do feet for a living?' - pointing to me cutting their toenails grrrrr!!!! I always say 'oh it's more than just that, we look at sensation, circulation, alignment - list goes on and on...' What do others say to steer them away from this myth!?
     
  24. Peter

    Peter Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    1. what made you want to mess around with peoples feet for?
    2. I only need a pedicure!
    3. I know my feet, they can't wait 4 months

    GGGGGRRRRR!!!!!!!
     
  25. cheryl

    cheryl Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Great answers on this thread.

    Also how many people stopped telling people their occupation in pubs, parties etc. Ive had many a foot plonked on a bar in front of me.
     
  26. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Just tell them this (I borrowed this from Podiatric Surgeon colleague.....thanks Mario!)

    Podiatry, Medicine and Dentistry are the only 3 professions that can actually operate on the Human Body.......

    or.......

    Frankly, I'm happy to cut your nails right now after all the Surgical / High-risk/ Diabetic / Rheumatology / Orthoses / Paediatric.....Cases I've seen today, it makes a nice change !

    or......

    Well it was this or Proctology ! (Then tell them what a Proctologist does...)

    or.........

    I'd love to answer you but I have to rush to get my Mercedes serviced !

    or......

    I'd love to answer but my Lear Jet is fueled and standing-by !

    or.......

    I would have become a Dentist, but couldn't take the pay-cut !

    Seriously, it says more about them than it does about you. We've been battling this for years and there is no one perfect answer.

    Hope this helps, and let me know which one you'll use (if any!)

    Julian
     
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2007
  27. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Glad you are enjoying the thread. It's certainly brightened my day!

    I also like when you go into the waiting room and 5 people start doing impersonations of meercats or seals at feeding time. One day i'm going to throw somebody a herring and see if they catch it in their mouth!

    Also
    You examine a foot. you find an NV corn. You use your history taking skills to find out about it. You differentiate it from an HD or a VP using you're years of diagnostic ability and your knowledge of dermatology. You casually observe it's location and come up with a type of padding which will most effectivly offload it based on your knowledge of biomechanics. You then use your aseptic technique to keep it clean and your 10 years of practice at debridement to debride with exquisite care with fractional milimetric detail around individual nerve fibres.
    And the patient says....
    Come on, sing along, you know the words....

    "I'D HAVE DONE IT MYSELF ONLY I CAN'T GET DOWN THERE!"

    :mad: :mad: :mad:

    More, more!
     
  28. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Things you never want to hear from patients.....

    1. I left my wallet in my other pants...!
    2. Mind if I leave my kids with your Secretary while I go to the shops...?
    3. Sorry I just stepped on a Dog Turd...... !
    4. Do you do animals as well.....?



    True story:
    We had a lady bring in her elderly Husband (who suffers from Dementia) for Primary Care treatment. Anyway, she disappears to "...run a small errand..." for approximately 2.5 hours. Finally, after my Secretary is driven nuts entertaining the Husband, the Woman returns and offers her apologies. She pays his account and It suddenly dawns on me. After her Private Medical insurance refund the visit only costs her about $20 (Australian Dollars), WAY WAY cheaper than paying for a Carer / Nurse to mind the Husband for 2.5 hours (Around $30-50 per hour = $75-$125) ! :mad:
     
  29. Peter

    Peter Well-Known Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Code:
    Also how many people stopped telling people their occupation in pubs, parties etc. Ive had many a foot plonked on a bar in front of me.
    I once did a Biomechanical exam in a pub in Stoke. My mate whom I was examining, refused however to loosen his belt for me to examine his PSIS for leg length inequality!
    I ended up with an audience who gave a round of appluase when i finished.
     
  30. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    :D LOL
    We have a saying over here. It helps if you can do an essex or cockney accent..

    Eeees magged ew rite orff! (translated - he's mugged you right off)
     
  31. Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Half way through treatment

    "i keep the athletes foot away by soaking my feet in urine every morning"

    And when in a patients home when a Dog which is practically a horse, with glowing red eyes, teeth the length of your fingers and froth dripping from a mouth which could accomodate a football advances on you with the sort of snarl which starts in it's throat and ends up in someone elses, claws leaving deep scrapes in the flagstone floor...

    "oh don't worry about Fang, he's a just a big softy. Just give him a poke if he's a nuisance!"
     
  32. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    I'll try but might end up like Eh up by gum !

    Luckily (for us) the poor old guy was sent off to a secure facility not long after ! Sort of reminds me of the inimitable Basil Fawlty when told he looked happy...."Yes, one of the guests just died...!" :D
     
  33. George F

    George F Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    1. Where do you buy your scalpels from?
    2. NHS dom patient calls your clinic to say "sorry i missed you the other day, i went to the hairdressers"!!! :mad:
     
  34. ja99

    ja99 Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Too true... :mad:

    Things you never want to hear from Patients:

    Missed Appointment reasons:

    I missed our appointment because I was having a Colonic........

    ....the Cat was running a fever !
    ....the cleaning lady was running late !
    ....I was having a Bad hair day !



    :D :D :D
     
  35. andymiles

    andymiles Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    "sorry i'm 15 mins late, at least it gave you the chance to have a cup of tea"

    my normal retort to this is "that's ok they'll be done badly", but from now on i'm going to try your approach and see how long it takes the patient to work out that i'm a southpaw anyway :cool:
     
  36. andymiles

    andymiles Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    used to annoy me intensely back in the day but now life has took a hold and i'm no longer the fresh faced young cheekychops i once was i kinda miss it...
     
  37. Johnpod

    Johnpod Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Great thread guys - thoroughly enjoying it!

    Only slightly different - things folks do in the waiting room...

    How many of us has had to get out the hoover because somebody has cut their own toe nails while they were waiting?
     
  38. Griff

    Griff Moderator

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    - I've got sugar diabetes
    - I think my foot pain is just rheumatism
    - What did you study at university?
    - I used to go privately but I dont anymore because he increased his prices to £15
     
  39. Phil Wells

    Phil Wells Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    Add my two penneth

    - I've got blood pressure (Too which I usually think 'shame')
    - Patients who, after complaining that they can't cut their own nails, lift the foot up to their face and rub it expertly to check for a 'qaulity' finish.
    - I've had 12 pairs of orthotics from other people and got my money back from all of them.

    And the (true) best excuse from a patient wanting a refund for a pair of OTC orthoses that they insisted they needed ' I was menapausal on that day so couldn't make a proper decsion.'
     
  40. RussAgg

    RussAgg Active Member

    Re: Things you never want to hear from patients

    'Oh, I thought this was on the NHS'
     
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